Divorced with kids

I’m not sure if and/or when I will get used to “sharing” my kids. Having nights where they aren’t with me and not by choice is still hard for me. I thought by now I would be used to it, but I’m not. Don’t get me wrong, I like these breaks to be able to relax….. wait, did I say relax? I think I meant get caught up on things! Honestly I do try and relax a little when they are with their dad. Majority of it is keeping busy doing things that are easier when I don’t have them such as yard work, cleaning (without the re-cleaning within 10 minutes), grocery and household shopping and whatever else I can find. All of that is a mix of it needs to get done and I need to keep busy so I don’t feel lonely.

I have found that sometimes watching videos I have of the kids helps. I also had to start taking melatonin to sleep at night when they aren’t home. Even if I turn on their lullabies it’s still too “quiet” without them home.

Am I crazy? So many people so enjoy the break, take the time to be wild and crazy. As good as that sounds it just doesn’t…. hit the spot I guess is the best explanation. Is it just me, if not how long does it take to not miss them each weekend? Does it ever go away?

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